If only life were a fairytale

Then we could escape this cruel twist world

A life where we constantly have to blend in with society in hopes of not becoming a target

Ignoring the fact that you’re already a target.

The moment you took your first breath someone was being taught they were superior than you, someone was taught to fear you, and yes someone was taught that your life was so worthless that they can take it and get away with it.

This is a reality that you my dear boy will have to come to terms with at an early age.

Like Langston Hughes Mother to Son,

You my son must learn what I learned many years ago.

Life for me ain’t been no crystal stair and life for you just won’t be fair,

But as the blood of our ancestors flow through your veins,

Always remember, when you walk out of a room their perception of you will never be the same.

With the purest aura and the strength of a thousand men,

Those tacky stairs in the form of privileged individuals will see what I have seen since the moment of your birth.

A STRONG BLACK NEGUS.

Artist Unknown

Standing here now, I only have one thought in mind, “I am not who I once used to be.”

The reflection staring back in the mirror is strikingly different these many years later.

My rich chocolate skin is now a tad darker,

Processed hair now transitioned to locs,

Slim shape graduated to thick and curvy,

A complete sign of evolution.

Peeling off the layers of clothing like the layers of my past that I fought so hard to overcome is like a weight lifting to finally reveal what I have been waiting so long to see.

My naked truth.

A truth I had so long hidden with baggy clothes that gave me the ability to physically feel all the years of self doubt and hated that society inflicted on me internally.

Taking years and years of my life as I sat through therapy learning that I am not the problem.

But now I get.

Right here in this moment, in all my glory, I can smile.

And it is genuine.

Because I have overcame and silenced the noise of all those who don’t matter.

I have finally learned to love me.

Artist Unknown

It all started with a simple conversation.

A conversation filled with many hesitant questions that I told myself were irrelevant.

Internally battling that voice that replaced my curiosity with fear.

Fear of finding everything I had been told was all an illusion.

An illusion created to keep many in a deep slumber while the wicked ran rampant.

Free of all consequences while the lost ones looked on with the rose colored glasses they were given so long ago.

Just as I have been for many years.

Until a simple conversation brought forth a simple question,

Can I tell you something?

The something was like finding pages and pages of a lost text.

The erased writings on the wall our ancestors left.

Now returned to its rightful owners.

To decipher the meaning.

As they awaken from their slumber.

With eyes wide open.

It is now midnight and before I close my eyes, I must give thanks to the universe for such a blessing. Many do not live to see the age I have made it to. I know that personally as a parent who has buried a child. To live to see another day, another year around the sun, another waking moment has me feeling if nothing else but grateful. As Covid has hit and knocked the world in a state of chaos, I have found motivation for many firsts. 2020 was my year of yes and branching out. I have become more consistent with showcasing my work not only on my blog, but also on Instagram, my work will be in not 1, but 2 online magazines, I have found a love for painting and getting pretty darn good at it, and I am preparing to launch a business with my husband. My support system has showed up and showed out with the love and I am eternally thankful for those. Many I have known for years and some just recently, but it goes to prove to me that there are good people in return that only want the best for you expecting nothing in return. Moving forward, it’s full steam ahead to finish out this year. I pray that the most high continue to find me worthy of this life I live and continue to rain blessings down as needed and not just off of wants. May universe and ancestors continue to guide me down my intended path and protect me from all that is meant to cause harm. I hope that I inspire may as others have inspired me on this journey I have been on and may my love and passion flow through my craft. Asé

After being up painting (I’m a beginner but I’m loving it), I felt like writing. Naturally I had to pair it with what I created.

I just want the world to know my name like Basquiat or Kara Walker

Minus the graffiti and silhouettes

Stun the world with abstract visions until they think I’ve done my best

Then tell em I ain’t done yet

Putting my paint brush down for a pen

Creating message after message

Planting seeds to help my people win

Because you see,

One day on common ground we must all meet

It’s enough out here for everyone to eat

We not the crabs in the bucket

We’re the Kings and Queens

With the heart of the lion and lioness

Broken free from the chains

Destined for greatness

Like the ancestors that left writings on the walls

Our actions will do the same for those next in line

And after I’m gone and my many greats say my name

It’ll be followed by words such as this:

My many many Great-Grandmother was an artist. She created abstract visions that stunned the world like Basquiat and Kara Walker. Minus the graffiti and silhouettes of course. When she wasn’t painting she was writing. Some would describe her as woke and others would say passionate. A conversation with her was always full revolutionary topics and funny jokes, but at the end of the day she was for her people and the people are for her. So when I say her name, I say it pride. Be a use of her, I come from greatness and now the world knows her name.

Sometimes it’s difficult to determine what you want to do with you life. There’s endless options, but seems as if it’s not enough time. We feel rushed to jump into a career field that’s supposed to make us happy because of the amount of money being made. In the words of Bob Marley, “Money can’t buy life.” What good is a job if you can’t be happy doing it? How can you provide the best service possible if you don’t want to be there?

I’ve tried many career fields over time and many hobbies that I turned out to be quite good at. Hit me with a medical question and I’ll answer it with no problem, T-shirt making with silk screens was a breeze, and the list goes on. Although I was good at it, I didn’t have a passion for it. I’ve always wanted to walk to the beat of my own drum at my own pace. Ownership is the key in the end.

That led me to something I enjoyed and didn’t know it. I’m a book nerd who has discovered a love for writing. Some days I can write and never get tired, but then there’s days where I don’t want to think about writing a thing. That’s part of the beauty of independence. I don’t answer to anyone and don’t feel forced to push out anything.

I released my first book last year which was a fantasy called Lemuria: The Return Home by K. Nicole. Now although it didn’t do as well as I’d like, it gave me that experience and a idea of how to move forward. I’m sitting on a few rough drafts that’s waiting to be polished up and enhancing my writing skills through my blog. They’ll release when it’s meant for the world to see them. If my time is up before then, I know those that support me will unveil them for me.

I’m in a good place right now. I could’ve easily signed with a publisher already and feel as if I’m pumping out books on an assembly line, but where is the fun in that? I don’t saw that to down anyone with a publisher because some people actually enjoy pushing out books that quickly and I even thought about it for myself at one point, but it’s just not for me. I will take my time and grind in a way that sits well in my spirit.

So I say this to say, no matter how long it take you, you will find your groove. Don’t be in such a rush to pick a career or hobby just because society deems that you should be in a certain place in life because of your age. You’ll know what’s meant for you when you actually enjoy what you’re doing and it doesn’t feel like mandatory work. Just look at me up at 5 a.m. getting my thoughts out without feeling forced. I found my groove and now perfecting it. Make sure you find yours and live life!